‘So I woke up cold again. Even with a nice puffy duvet and not one but two blankets, I was cold. Even though Bono had crept under the covers during the night, and even with our combined body heat, I was still flipping cold.
‘It’s funny really, Mum used to tell me that there are two kinds of people; hot and cold, and I was the cold sort. Milly the Snowman she had called me once. Milly the Snowman with her icy cold heart. Boy do I miss her.
‘It was still early, not really light yet, sun was just coming up but you know, once I’m awake there’s no way I’m getting back to sleep. Someone’s belly was grumbling loudly and to be honest, it was hard to tell if it was me or the dog.
‘We had croissants for breakfast, I’d actually managed to get them really cheap from Tesco just before they closed. It’s crazy, they bake all these nice bread and pastries in the morning and if they don’t sell it all by the end of the day, they slap a big yellow sticker on with a ridiculously low price and put it all on table that says “everything must go!” I’d got us some croissants, a sourdough bloomer and some fancy Danish thing for 52 pence, what a bargain eh?
‘So anyways, we were sat on this nice steel bench in the park eating these croissants and there was this woman walking down the path with a pram. She was wearing this posh long coat, it was all red with shiny silver buttons and the pram was like one of the old fashioned ones, vintage, lots of wires and a hard cold metal frame and it was all black too.
‘I wasn’t bothering her or anything, honestly I didn’t do or say anything to her at all. I had no intentions of doing anything to her or her baby. But she spat on me, as she strolled past in her fancy coat with her fancy pram, she spat on me and called me scum. It came as a right shock to me because like I said, I was just trying to sit there and enjoy a nice croissant with my dog.
‘I shouldn’t have done it, look right, I know that now but there was something about her that just made me so red hot angry, it’s not like I wasn’t provoked or anything. She didn’t get to treat me like that and get away with it scot-free, I deserve better than being spat on by some woman who’s probably only got such nice things because her husband is rich. I bet she hasn’t done a days work in her life.
‘So I did what anyone in my position would do and yeah, I’m not proud of it but she got what was coming to her. I think I must have knocked over the pram while I did it as well because next thing I knew, there was this ugly pink thing rolling around on the frosty pavement, wailing away. It was so loud, like a thousand crows all squawking at once and see here’s the thing about Bono right, he hates birds, like really really hates them. One time he spent a whole hour just barking at this tree that was full of them and they just sat there, high up in the branches, doing nothing like he was nothing to them.
‘That’s probably why he did what he did though, because of the bird thing I mean. I don’t think he meant to do it either though. he was just trying to protect me because that’s what I’ve trained him to do.’
‘Sorry Miss Maple, but can I just stop you there.’
Milly paused and glared across the table into the eyes of the detective inspector,
‘What is it exactly that you did to Mrs Cameron in the park?’
A slow smile formed it’s way across Milly the Snowman’s face.